Recently at my mother's house (reason #1 why I haven't posted in 2 weeks) I was having a conversation with my step-dad.
Me: Did mom tell you what I'm taking next year?
Dad: Nah, what are you taking?
Me: history, required intro English, topics in English: women and modernism, deductive logic-
Dad: *laughing heartily* Well that's a contradiction right there!
Me: *eyebrow's raised* And why's that?
Dad: Because modern women aren't logical! *more laughter*
Me: *stunned silence*
Where to start with this? Social blunder #1, I am a "modern woman" and a philosophy major. I am the exact opposite of the demographic that would find that funny. Social blunder #2, giving false information is not funny, it is usually considered ignorant and people respect you less. Way to go, dad.
Showing posts with label sexism. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sexism. Show all posts
Friday, July 24, 2009
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Why I Am A Feminist
This week while looking at Feministe’s Shameless Self-Promotion Sunday, I read this blog: http://nicefeminist.wordpress.com/2009/07/10/25-reasons-why-i-am-a-feminist/
It inspired me to write my own reasons for being a feminist. So, here are the 25 reasons why I am a feminist:
1. Because I never want another girl to have to be molested by her step-brother when she is twelve years old.
2. Because when I was seventeen my mother said any didn’t have any friends- because none of the people I spent time with were female.
3. Because when I have a conversation with my male friends it becomes their conversation, and I am left sitting there, silent, trying and failing to get a word in.
4. Because a potential person is still considered more important than an actual one.
5. Because if our friends knew what my fiancé is like when it’s just the two of us, he wouldn’t be friends with them anymore. They wouldn’t be friends with someone who is so “whipped”.
6. Because liking stuffed animals and Fallout III is somehow scandalous.
7. Because as sweet and respectful George has always been, he is still only now starting to understand why sexist humor is indeed, not humor.
8. Because if I walk around in public topless with my large fiancé whose chest is as big as mine, I will be arrested for indecent exposure and people will wonder why he let me do that.
9. Because there is a size zero in women’s clothing.
10. Because when I’m a mother and I work, I’ll be a “working mom”, but no one will ever suggest that my husband is a “working father”.
11. Because when I express my sadness in a healthy way, by crying, then I am overemotional. When my fiancé express his anger through intense rage, he is just being a “man”.
12. Because when I moved in with George my family was shocked and appalled, but his could care less.
13. Because when I told my step-father I had lost my virginity, he was disappointed. When his son told him he lost his virginity, all he had to say was, “way to go”.
14. Because I can’t walk down the street alone at night.
15. Because there are still people out there who think women have equality and we should just stop complaining.
16. Because there are people in the world who think they have the right to make decisions for you about your sexuality.
17. Because according to the majority of people, my morality lies between my legs.
18. Because when I was fifteen, despite that I was wearing a dress, I was mistaken for a boy because of my short hair.
19. Because “girly” or “queer” are insults in this country.
20. Because according to people in the marketing business, women do not buy things unless they are pink.
21. Because it’s more acceptable for me to cross gender boundaries than it is for my fiancé, because masculinity is more valuable than femininity.
22. Because when my fiancé wears clothes with holes and stains people look at me and wonder why I let him wear that.
23. Because when I call someone on their offensive jokes, I’m just another humorless feminist.
24. Because everyone laughed when my best friend gave her son a doll.
25. Because most people don’t think about these things.
It inspired me to write my own reasons for being a feminist. So, here are the 25 reasons why I am a feminist:
1. Because I never want another girl to have to be molested by her step-brother when she is twelve years old.
2. Because when I was seventeen my mother said any didn’t have any friends- because none of the people I spent time with were female.
3. Because when I have a conversation with my male friends it becomes their conversation, and I am left sitting there, silent, trying and failing to get a word in.
4. Because a potential person is still considered more important than an actual one.
5. Because if our friends knew what my fiancé is like when it’s just the two of us, he wouldn’t be friends with them anymore. They wouldn’t be friends with someone who is so “whipped”.
6. Because liking stuffed animals and Fallout III is somehow scandalous.
7. Because as sweet and respectful George has always been, he is still only now starting to understand why sexist humor is indeed, not humor.
8. Because if I walk around in public topless with my large fiancé whose chest is as big as mine, I will be arrested for indecent exposure and people will wonder why he let me do that.
9. Because there is a size zero in women’s clothing.
10. Because when I’m a mother and I work, I’ll be a “working mom”, but no one will ever suggest that my husband is a “working father”.
11. Because when I express my sadness in a healthy way, by crying, then I am overemotional. When my fiancé express his anger through intense rage, he is just being a “man”.
12. Because when I moved in with George my family was shocked and appalled, but his could care less.
13. Because when I told my step-father I had lost my virginity, he was disappointed. When his son told him he lost his virginity, all he had to say was, “way to go”.
14. Because I can’t walk down the street alone at night.
15. Because there are still people out there who think women have equality and we should just stop complaining.
16. Because there are people in the world who think they have the right to make decisions for you about your sexuality.
17. Because according to the majority of people, my morality lies between my legs.
18. Because when I was fifteen, despite that I was wearing a dress, I was mistaken for a boy because of my short hair.
19. Because “girly” or “queer” are insults in this country.
20. Because according to people in the marketing business, women do not buy things unless they are pink.
21. Because it’s more acceptable for me to cross gender boundaries than it is for my fiancé, because masculinity is more valuable than femininity.
22. Because when my fiancé wears clothes with holes and stains people look at me and wonder why I let him wear that.
23. Because when I call someone on their offensive jokes, I’m just another humorless feminist.
24. Because everyone laughed when my best friend gave her son a doll.
25. Because most people don’t think about these things.
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Monday, July 13, 2009
I Am Not a Lady- Sexism and Language, Part 1
George: “I love you naked lady”
Me: “I am not a lady”
George: “You do indeed have a vagina”
Me: ”But I am not a lady. I have worked very hard to ensure that people do not view me as a lady, and yet you confine me to this title on the basis of my genitalia.”
To be fair, he really is trying. He always understands when I point something out to him that is sexist and he apologizes; it is very hard to undo years of misogyny culture damage. Even I find myself saying things like this sometimes.
Why do I find lady offensive? Because I am not a lady. I do not embody the qualities of a lady, except that I do have a vagina. However, as society often tells us, lady-ness is not defined by a person’s vagina-having status. According to society, gays and inadequately testosterone-ridden males are ladies. Dykes and inadequately estrogen-ridden females are not. According to the top two definitions on dictionary.com, a lady is:
1. a woman who is refined, polite, and well-spoken: She may be poor and have little education, but she's a real lady.
2. a woman of high social position or economic class: She was born a lady and found it hard to adjust to her reduced circumstances.
I am crass and blue-collar. I must admit that as a scholar and an English major, I am articulate and do have a large vocabulary, but I feel that I am still far from ladylike in my language. I am loud and sometimes obnoxious if that’s what it takes to get my point across. I’m only polite/shy/quiet with my father-in-law, but that’s just because he’s a mite scary. Also, my “well-spoken”-ness doesn’t so much have to do with any trace of being ladylike, but it’s more that I am well educated- something very un-ladylike indeed.
Me: “I am not a lady”
George: “You do indeed have a vagina”
Me: ”But I am not a lady. I have worked very hard to ensure that people do not view me as a lady, and yet you confine me to this title on the basis of my genitalia.”
To be fair, he really is trying. He always understands when I point something out to him that is sexist and he apologizes; it is very hard to undo years of misogyny culture damage. Even I find myself saying things like this sometimes.
Why do I find lady offensive? Because I am not a lady. I do not embody the qualities of a lady, except that I do have a vagina. However, as society often tells us, lady-ness is not defined by a person’s vagina-having status. According to society, gays and inadequately testosterone-ridden males are ladies. Dykes and inadequately estrogen-ridden females are not. According to the top two definitions on dictionary.com, a lady is:
1. a woman who is refined, polite, and well-spoken: She may be poor and have little education, but she's a real lady.
2. a woman of high social position or economic class: She was born a lady and found it hard to adjust to her reduced circumstances.
I am crass and blue-collar. I must admit that as a scholar and an English major, I am articulate and do have a large vocabulary, but I feel that I am still far from ladylike in my language. I am loud and sometimes obnoxious if that’s what it takes to get my point across. I’m only polite/shy/quiet with my father-in-law, but that’s just because he’s a mite scary. Also, my “well-spoken”-ness doesn’t so much have to do with any trace of being ladylike, but it’s more that I am well educated- something very un-ladylike indeed.
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